My dilemma

Okay, so here’s the deal: My ex moved three hours’ drive out of town a couple of years ago. His job requires him to work way too much, and so he can’t see the kids every other weekend like he’s supposed to. Add to this the fact that he doesn’t want to drive 12 hours every weekend that he does have them, so he moves into my house and I have to move out. At my cost. As my mother so eloquently put it, I have to pay to leave my own home. When their dad does take them to his place (actually, only one of them because he doesn’t have room for both) he expects me to drive half way to meet him. At my cost.

From the time he had the kids last, to the time he has them next, I will have had them for 5 weeks (four weekends). My dilemma is this: do I start drinking wine now? And if so, should I try to have any of the 20 bottles I have in my basement left by the time I get another weekend off (at my cost)? Or should I just throw up my hands and drink the lot?

My life seriously fucking sucks sometimes.

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Is your son at home?

Gotta love it when the school calls to say your kid is missing. That apparently the last person to see him, spotted him outside 45 minutes ago in his jacket and with his backpack. And this from an acting temporary principal who, to his credit, sounded legitimately nervous when he apologized for losing my son. He, then, sounded a bit relieved when I told him I could contact the miscreant via cell phone. Which I did. He’s back at school now.

That he’s an Autistic 20 year old makes things difficult in regards to disciplinary actions. But hey, rules are rules. He’s probably facing the consequences as I write this.

Thank god for cell phones.

Epic Parenting on Thanksgiving Day

My eldest son, whilst hugging me: Thanks for an awesome dinner, Mom. You’re a good shit.
Me: You’re a good shit too, Fred. You’re welcome.

True story.

This post is part of One-Liner Wednesday. Give it a try! Just click the link to find out more: http://lindaghill.com/2015/10/14/one-liner-wednesday-im-driving-here/

Real conversations in my house 3/21/15

Chris: Mom, where are you?

Me: (calling) I’m in the washroom.

Chris: (a few seconds later, right outside the door. singing) Do you want to build a snowman?

Me: I’m trying to pee.

Chris: (singing) It doesn’t have to be a snowman…

Me: Go away Chris.

Chris: Okay.

Daily Prompt – A teacher of life

The Daily Post prompt today is: What makes a teacher great?

A great teacher of life allows his student to make her own mistakes.
A great teacher of life teaches by example.
These may take longer than to tell, or to teach using books,
but they are lessons more likely to stay with the student throughout her lifetime.

A real conversation in my house Pt. 3

Well that went downhill fast ~~~~

Chris: Did you eat an egg?

Me: Yes.

Chris: Why did you eat an egg?

Me: Because I like them.

Chris: Did I used to be an egg in your tummy?

Me: Yes.

Chris: Did you have sex with my dad so I could be an egg in your tummy?

Me: Yes.

Chris: Ok.

What comes around

Ugh, these viruses. We go out in public and we watch, don’t we? Avoiding those who sneeze or cough at all costs. We use hand sanitizer like it’s dishwater after Christmas dinner – we soak in it. Hell, we’d bathe in it if we could. Okay, maybe that’s just me; it gives you an idea of how much I don’t want to catch something nasty.

BUT. We can’t always rely on the fact that even though people don’t appear to be sick, they might be. According to my observations, it takes about 3 days from the time one gets infected until the symptoms show up. If I haven’t been out of the house in a while but I start to feel ill, I can usually count back and figure out where I picked up the sneaky asshole of a bug.

And then there are the people I live with. Unlike me they have lives. They go out and socialize every day. Then they come home. And don’t ya know, I still finish their meals and drink from their glasses because they LOOK fine…

I have a sickie in my basement right now. He has to come up eventually–there’s no washroom down there…

Standing at the top of the stairs armed with my bottle of hand sanitizer is a hard way to spend a day. But I’m not taking any chances.